Archive for September, 2005

Strike one for the common man (woman, or hermaphrodite).

Court Nixes Some Ads Sent to Cell Phones

If you think the brain is as cool a toy as I do, you will like this article on the brain and the mechanics of profanity.
Almost Before We Spoke, We Swore

Apparently Photohsop can work wonders for the differently faced.
Traditionally I’ve found that applying beer internally has the same effect.

Must be bizarro day for science news…
US plans first face transplant

Ok this is just wrong on so many levels…
Tongue-eating bug found in fish

Worst Disaster

I wonder if they were commenting on whether the caption appearing is true, or the statement made by the caption is true… ;-)

OK, so I’m having a personal sarcasm issue. Now that the Republican party has shown that it doesn’t have a conservative bone it it’s political body, I look forward to a future where I will be able to say “I’m a conservative” without having to add “but I’m not a Republican”.

Here is a wonderful little Report from the Cato institute. It outlines spending increases over the last 30 years (please note that the report has already removed spending for the military and homeland security). My favorite graph is on the 5th page.
Here is a link to the CATO summary…

It looks like oregon might get a sweet little volcano (might take a few thousand more years, but it’s never too soon to worry).
Mystery Bulge in Oregon Still Growing

ShrinkTo5 is supposed to be the latest and greatest program for shrinking DVD’s to fit on DVD recordable media. It’s nice that it’s open source, supposedly it is currently being ported to multiple platforms. Untested…

How to prevent the disaster in New Orleans from ever happening again:
1. Move everyone out of the city and away from the coast.
2. Level the city.
3. Fill in the hole.

I’m debating adding a step 4 which would involve concertina wire and land mines. Which may be the only way to keep people from sneaking in and building again.

Maybe the above is extreme, but I am willing to entertain another idea….

What if FEMA and FIMA were reimbursed by each state, for whatever assistance they provide within the state? If they don’t like the service each state is allowed to build their emergency services, or hire someone else to provide the service.

I wonder if the people planning to live in the New Orleans area would think it’s worth the cost to rebuild a city in a bowl by the sea if they had to foot the bill using only their own tax dollars?

“Thar she blows!” – The pirate equivalent of “Whoop, there it is!”.

“ARRRGHHHH” – this phrase shows general discontent. or it can also mean that someone is about to get wild- a.k.a. a battle cry.

“wake me at the zenith of the moon” – only full blown pirates know this phrase. An educated pirate is rare but also the most deadly kind. They are smarter than you and crazier.

A dark and stormy – this is not a phrase but a drink. This is what true pirates drink. It is made of goslings rum and ginger beer. it is a delight to the senses.

“Avast ye scum ridden weevil shaggers. Captain Black Beard is gonna keel haul you and grow barnacles on ye starboard knacker”. – The Captain isn’t happy…D

“I’m gonna make a kill” – this pirate is going to kill something…and he is serious about it.

“Dogs ahoy !” – Equivalent of “Things to kill, straight ahead.”

“Shiver me timbers!” – like saying “oh My!” like my legs are shaking

“Skuttle me Skippers” – Making a mistake and being judged for/by it.

“Avast ye varmint” – Stop right there young man because you’re in big trouble.

“Weigh anchor!” – Let’s go!

“Yarr.” – I agree.

“Yarr!” – I see your point, and agree wholeheartedly.

“Yarr-ha-harr!” – You’re right!

“Kissin’ the Gunner’s Daughter” – Receiving some serious punishment

“Blow me down!” – You don’t say? How surprising.

“Ye Scalawag!” – You dirty dog!

“Savvy?” – Is that okay with you? Do you understand?

“Ahoy” – call to attract attention, something akin to ‘Hello, there!’

“Clap of Thunder” – powerful drink

“”Fo’c’s’le” – Slang for Forecastle. Small candlelit room where a pirate used the sopping bucket. (Bathroom)

“Jack” – a flag or a sailor; showing how sailors would refer to thier ship’s colors as one of the crew. Hence Jack Tar for sailor and the Union Jack flag.

“Loaded to the Gunwhales” – drunk

“Messdeck lawyer” – a know-it-all

“Nipperkin” – a small drink

“Salmagundi” – a dish of chopped meat, eggs, anchovies, onions and anything else the cook can throw in; a piratical delicacy

“Son of a Biscuit Eater” – not so much a sailor term, but a derrogatory term indicating someone you don’t like

“Landlubber” – a “Non-pirate” or a curse for someone who is a coward

In a phenomonon noticed first by the Voyager (The space probe not the star treck splitter) mission the rings of Saturn have visible distortions (spokes). Have some sweet planetary science.

Here is a Longer movie

Looks like Google is still hard at work, trying to own the known world of search engines…

Welcome to the Google Blog Search

How annoying… (warning gets kinda geeky)
Uk.com wildcard raises Net stability worries

Ahhh, say farewell to TiVo.
TiVo copy protection bug irks users

TiVo 7.2 OS adds red flag content protection.

So I guess I will have to set up a Mac to replace my TiVo…

Time is short, only 9 shopping days left until Talk Like A Pirate Day. Which if I remember correctly is Mel’s favorite holiday of the year (after christmas, halloween, the fouth of july, new years eve, and maybe Victoria Day… ;-)

A few pointers to get you going (from the site):
The basics

Pirate lingo is rich and complicated, sort of like a good stew. There are several other sites that offer glossaries that are pretty good, and you can find some of them on our links page.

But if you just want a quick fix, a surface gloss, a “pirate patina,” if you will, here are the five basic words that you cannot live without. Master them, and you can face Talk Like a Pirate Day with a smile on your face and a parrot on your shoulder, if that’s your thing.

Ahoy! – “Hello!”

Avast! – Stop and give attention. It can be used in a sense of surprise, “Whoa! Get a load of that!” which today makes it more of a “Check it out” or “No way!” or “Get off!”

Aye! – “Why yes, I agree most heartily with everything you just said or did.”

Aye aye! – “I’ll get right on that sir, as soon as my break is over.”

Arrr! – This one is often confused with arrrgh, which is of course the sound you make when you sit on a belaying pin. “Arrr!” can mean, variously, “yes,” “I agree,” “I’m happy,” “I’m enjoying this beer,” “My team is going to win it all,” “I saw that television show, it sucked!” and “That was a clever remark you or I just made.” And those are just a few of the myriad possibilities of Arrr!
Advanced pirate lingo; or On beyond “Aarrr!”

Once you’ve mastered the basics, you’re ready to start expanding your pirate vocabulary. Try these for starters

Beauty – The best possible pirate address for a woman. Always preceded by “me,” as in, “C’mere, me beauty,” or even, “me buxom beauty,” to one particularly well endowed. You’ll be surprised how effective this is.

Bilge rat – The bilge is the lowest level of the ship. It’s loaded with ballast and slimy, reeking water. A bilge rat, then, is a rat that lives in the worst place on the ship. On TLAP Day – A lot of guy humor involves insulting your buddies to prove your friendship. It’s important that everyone understand you are smarter, more powerful and much luckier with the wenches than they are. Since bilge rat is a pretty dirty thing to call someone, by all means use it on your friends.

Bung hole – Victuals on a ship were stored in wooden casks. The stopper in the barrel is called the bung, and the hole is called the bung hole. That’s all. It sounds a lot worse, doesn’t it? On TLAP Day – When dinner is served you’ll make quite an impression when you say, “Well, me hearties, let’s see what crawled out of the bung hole.” That statement will be instantly followed by the sound of people putting down their utensils and pushing themselves away from the table. Great! More for you!

Grog – An alcoholic drink, usually rum diluted with water, but in this context you could use it to refer to any alcoholic beverage other than beer, and we aren’t prepared to be picky about that, either. Call your beer grog if you want. We won’t stop you! Water aboard ship was stored for long periods in slimy wooden barrels, so you can see why rum was added to each sailor’s water ration – to kill the rancid taste. On TLAP Day – Drink up, me hearties! And call whatever you’re drinking grog if you want to. If some prissy pedant purses his lips and protests the word grog can only be used if drinking rum and water, not the Singapore Sling you’re holding, keelhaul him!

Hornpipe – Both a single-reeded musical instrument sailors often had aboard ship, and a spirited dance that sailors do. On TLAP Day – We are not big fans of the capering, it’s not our favorite art form, if you will, so we don’t have a lot to say on the subject, other than to observe that the common term for being filled with lust is “horny,” and hornpipe then has some comical possibilities. “Is that a hornpipe in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me? Or both?”

Lubber – (or land lubber) This is the seaman’s version of land lover, mangled by typical pirate disregard for elocution. A lubber is someone who does not go to sea, who stays on the land. On TLAP Day – More likely than not, you are a lubber 364 days of the year. But not if you’re talking like a pirate! Then the word lubber becomes one of the more fierce weapons in your arsenal of piratical lingo. In a room where everyone is talking like pirates, lubber is ALWAYS an insult.

Smartly – Do something quickly. On TLAP Day – “Smartly, me lass,” you might say when sending the bar maid off for another round. She will be so impressed she might well spit in your beer.

Article on how to unlock your audiovox 5600 Smartphone for free. Unlock an AudioVox 5600 for free

Those wacky rabbits make me giggle…

Just wait until your phone video and internet are via internet and the internet infrastructure moves to a WiFi format. Hackers could completely isolate a business from all communications instead of just their internet presence.
Hackers Admit to Wave of Attacks